I am a parent of female child who has Rapid Onset of Gender Dysphoria (ROGD). This is a new phenomenon where a child, who was perfectly happy in his or her body until right around puberty, suddenly announces that he or she is the opposite sex. In the case of my daughter, when she developed this condition, she threw away all of her feminine clothes, cut her hair super short, refused to go out in public without a chest binder and stopped shaving her legs. And, of course, she came up with a new male-sounding name and insisted that everyone use it, along with the associated male pronouns.
Sweeping generalizations are not the way to the truth. You can’t just use a story of some trans people being creeps and then assume that all transgender people are creeps.
This is a heart-breaking story. I have heard it many times, although this is the first time that there was a strong porn angle.
Now, before I continue, I have to say that I'm a gay man. I am older and no longer attractive enough to attract a mate. I look at porn and masturbate (that's my sex life now). The porn I look at is, by and large, loving and tame, and I've never understood why anyone goes in for the heavy stuff. Because gay porn is meant for gay men and usually doesn't have female figures in it, I have never seen it as harmful to women. I think that even the men who go in for the heavy stuff are just acting out their sexual proclivities. Straight porn is different because it portrays women in humiliating ways.
So as I said, this porn angle (insofar as the exploitation of girls by trans activists is concerned) is new to me. Understanding trans activists is another matter, and needs a book to be explained. Trans people want to increase their numbers. They believe that they are the most deserving of minority groups (for reasons I won't go into here), so any harmful thing they do to increase their numbers is justified.
I think you are doing the right thing by actively fighting it in your daughter's life. Many parents just "roll over" and let their daughters do what they want. Someone needs to say: "This isn't right. This isn't healthy. Your ideas are wrong. You can't harm yourself this way."
If your daughter has a lick of sense, she'll come to her senses eventually, and I think she will appreciate that you tried to correct the unhealthy course she decided to take. Eventually she'll thank you for it -- i.e., IF she has a lick of sense. If she doesn't, she'll be taking testosterone at 18 (if she isn't already), and cutting off her breasts before she is 20. In the worst-case scenario, she'll become a detransitioner somewhere between 22 and 35. By then, if she has really harmed herself, she may commit suicide. I certainly hope not.
The best comfort I can offer you is something you will probably dismiss out of hand, and that is that I believe in reincarnation. Some lives are spent learning difficult lessons. (This life's lesson: Think for yourself; don't allow yourself to be influenced by people with an agenda.) When I was young, I was suspicious of medicine, and I assiduously resisted any kind of surgery until just a month ago when I had cataract surgery. I remember taking growth hormone supplements when I was young and promptly had an outbreak of cold sores. After that, I resolved: No more experimentation. I hope your daughter has enough sense not to go in for the heavy stuff (psychologically speaking). However, she is already going in for the heavy stuff (speaking of porn now), so perhaps she doesn't have the sense to be moderate.
I can imagine that your daughter won't accept any life advice from you, and that's a shame: People who are grounded don't have to be taught the truth: You must accept yourself as you are. There are only two genders. You have only one body and you must let it develop naturally. You must be cautious of new ideas. You must look before you leap. Et cetera. (There are thousands of truths.)
As for Pflag, almost every gay organization has been taken over by trans ideology (the trans people were very clever when they added the T to LGB).
interesting article, i think this issiue is about the times we are living in. i would encourage you into looking who you are as a person in order to find more meaning between you and your daughters, this may or may not help your daugher find her authentic self, but i would start with the question `how authentic i am`. as parents there are things outside of our control and our childern's identity might be one, atleast the limit we can effect it intentionally is very small and that what we do rather than what we say is much more impactful
My middle child was allowed a flip-phone when she was 10 so she could call me when she was visiting her dad every other weekend (we had recently split; he wouldn't allow her to use his cell phone & he didn't have a landline). She had no access to the internet on this phone, and she was not allowed social media accounts, so she set them up during her unsupervised time at her dad's, and through friends computers. She also communicated with creeps through the computer games she played at her dad's house; I discovered these conversations when she made the mistake of signing on through my computer, ipad & ipod. She was relentless, but her addiction was to social media, not porn. (This was also a few years before this trans agenda exploded everywhere.)
Your story is very disturbing and though I have long been concerned what young people are being offered on certain websites, it seems to be much worse than I thought. I shall share your narrative so that parents are more informed about how their children's minds and bodies are being messed up. Good luck to you and your daughter.💜
I say this without a hint of snark or irony. Why do parents allow their children to have screens in their rooms? Why do parents allow them to have free, unsupervised access to phones, computers, tablets, etc.? Our daughter was not allowed to have any screens in her room until she left for college. Why did the daughter in this family have hundreds of porn accounts, according to the list of sites and passwords she gave her mother? Does anyone have answers?
WOW - I just found this group and page. This feels like I'm reading my own story with my daughter, who is now nearly 24. She started this process around the age of 10. It stemmed from so many similar thing. I am writing this with tears streaming down my face bc it has been nearly 14 years of not knowing anyone who could so eloquently put into words what I have walked through. So glad to have found this page. God always directs us at the right time.
This explains a lot. My son was very sneaky. He's going to be 25, in Grad school, but is an online sex worker. I thought "Where is he getting this from?". Now I find out it's all over these trans kids.
This girl needs God in the biggest way! He is the only one who can trump her addictions. Prayers for her healing before it’s too late. This article is very insightful. Kids love to come up with their own language that they think we don’t understand. I learned a lot today. Thank you
Good god, this breaks my heart. I can identify with so much of what you have experienced. My daughter also experience ROGD starting at age 13. My daughter also lost her innocence online with similar experiences I only found out about later when she was suicidal and hospitalized. She has just turned 20, and I am trying to love her through this misery. I will not stop fighting to get my daughter back. We have a good relationship now and she trusts me, but I will be having some difficult talks with her soon to (hopefully) make her question these life-altering decisions. In the end, nothing may change but I will not give up. I love her beyond words, but I can see that this is not the solution for her. You're not alone in this craziness. Keep trying, keep questioning, keep loving, and don't give up on her. Your child and your relationship with them is worth it.
Wow! I feel your heartache. From one mother to another. Your story is almost identical to mine. I so agree with you. 100% The internet stole our girls. It is a sick world out there. All we can do is pray that our girls come back to their roots. The roots we planted in them. A solid foundation. We watered their roots with love and laughter and tears. I will never stop fighting for our children who lost their innocence online. Horrific! So please know you’re not alone in the battle. Keep fighting the good fight!!
Why should your daughter, in order to be a girl, have to present herself in the restrictive, out-dated, stereotyped trappings of a girl? That is part of the problem. We need to let children be who they are, wear the hair styles and clothing they like whether they are boys or girls. A girl who likes short hair, sports, and baggy clothes IS A GIRL who likes short hair, sports and baggy clothes. A girl who is attracted to other girls IS A GIRL who is attracted to girls. The trans-mob is one of the most repressive, hetero-normative, stereotyping, misogynist, anti-feminist, anti-lesbian/gay movements to ever exist and be so far reaching. Yes, fight back for your children but not by being trapped by gender stereotyping.
Sweeping generalizations are not the way to the truth. You can’t just use a story of some trans people being creeps and then assume that all transgender people are creeps.
This is a heart-breaking story. I have heard it many times, although this is the first time that there was a strong porn angle.
Now, before I continue, I have to say that I'm a gay man. I am older and no longer attractive enough to attract a mate. I look at porn and masturbate (that's my sex life now). The porn I look at is, by and large, loving and tame, and I've never understood why anyone goes in for the heavy stuff. Because gay porn is meant for gay men and usually doesn't have female figures in it, I have never seen it as harmful to women. I think that even the men who go in for the heavy stuff are just acting out their sexual proclivities. Straight porn is different because it portrays women in humiliating ways.
So as I said, this porn angle (insofar as the exploitation of girls by trans activists is concerned) is new to me. Understanding trans activists is another matter, and needs a book to be explained. Trans people want to increase their numbers. They believe that they are the most deserving of minority groups (for reasons I won't go into here), so any harmful thing they do to increase their numbers is justified.
I think you are doing the right thing by actively fighting it in your daughter's life. Many parents just "roll over" and let their daughters do what they want. Someone needs to say: "This isn't right. This isn't healthy. Your ideas are wrong. You can't harm yourself this way."
If your daughter has a lick of sense, she'll come to her senses eventually, and I think she will appreciate that you tried to correct the unhealthy course she decided to take. Eventually she'll thank you for it -- i.e., IF she has a lick of sense. If she doesn't, she'll be taking testosterone at 18 (if she isn't already), and cutting off her breasts before she is 20. In the worst-case scenario, she'll become a detransitioner somewhere between 22 and 35. By then, if she has really harmed herself, she may commit suicide. I certainly hope not.
The best comfort I can offer you is something you will probably dismiss out of hand, and that is that I believe in reincarnation. Some lives are spent learning difficult lessons. (This life's lesson: Think for yourself; don't allow yourself to be influenced by people with an agenda.) When I was young, I was suspicious of medicine, and I assiduously resisted any kind of surgery until just a month ago when I had cataract surgery. I remember taking growth hormone supplements when I was young and promptly had an outbreak of cold sores. After that, I resolved: No more experimentation. I hope your daughter has enough sense not to go in for the heavy stuff (psychologically speaking). However, she is already going in for the heavy stuff (speaking of porn now), so perhaps she doesn't have the sense to be moderate.
I can imagine that your daughter won't accept any life advice from you, and that's a shame: People who are grounded don't have to be taught the truth: You must accept yourself as you are. There are only two genders. You have only one body and you must let it develop naturally. You must be cautious of new ideas. You must look before you leap. Et cetera. (There are thousands of truths.)
As for Pflag, almost every gay organization has been taken over by trans ideology (the trans people were very clever when they added the T to LGB).
Good luck to you, and good luck to your daughter.
interesting article, i think this issiue is about the times we are living in. i would encourage you into looking who you are as a person in order to find more meaning between you and your daughters, this may or may not help your daugher find her authentic self, but i would start with the question `how authentic i am`. as parents there are things outside of our control and our childern's identity might be one, atleast the limit we can effect it intentionally is very small and that what we do rather than what we say is much more impactful
My middle child was allowed a flip-phone when she was 10 so she could call me when she was visiting her dad every other weekend (we had recently split; he wouldn't allow her to use his cell phone & he didn't have a landline). She had no access to the internet on this phone, and she was not allowed social media accounts, so she set them up during her unsupervised time at her dad's, and through friends computers. She also communicated with creeps through the computer games she played at her dad's house; I discovered these conversations when she made the mistake of signing on through my computer, ipad & ipod. She was relentless, but her addiction was to social media, not porn. (This was also a few years before this trans agenda exploded everywhere.)
Your story is very disturbing and though I have long been concerned what young people are being offered on certain websites, it seems to be much worse than I thought. I shall share your narrative so that parents are more informed about how their children's minds and bodies are being messed up. Good luck to you and your daughter.💜
I say this without a hint of snark or irony. Why do parents allow their children to have screens in their rooms? Why do parents allow them to have free, unsupervised access to phones, computers, tablets, etc.? Our daughter was not allowed to have any screens in her room until she left for college. Why did the daughter in this family have hundreds of porn accounts, according to the list of sites and passwords she gave her mother? Does anyone have answers?
"Nightmare" doesn't begin to describe what you've been up against.
I am so sorry.
Someone said recently that transgenderism is the new anorexia. I think that's pretty accurate, given my own family's experience.
WOW - I just found this group and page. This feels like I'm reading my own story with my daughter, who is now nearly 24. She started this process around the age of 10. It stemmed from so many similar thing. I am writing this with tears streaming down my face bc it has been nearly 14 years of not knowing anyone who could so eloquently put into words what I have walked through. So glad to have found this page. God always directs us at the right time.
Were you able to get her into therapy when she started drawing penises on the walls? That could have helped you both.
This explains a lot. My son was very sneaky. He's going to be 25, in Grad school, but is an online sex worker. I thought "Where is he getting this from?". Now I find out it's all over these trans kids.
do you all even realize trans people hate pornography? why do you think they changed the term from transsexual and transvestite to transgender?
this is the weirdest psyop ive read in a long while, govoritmoskva
This girl needs God in the biggest way! He is the only one who can trump her addictions. Prayers for her healing before it’s too late. This article is very insightful. Kids love to come up with their own language that they think we don’t understand. I learned a lot today. Thank you
Good god, this breaks my heart. I can identify with so much of what you have experienced. My daughter also experience ROGD starting at age 13. My daughter also lost her innocence online with similar experiences I only found out about later when she was suicidal and hospitalized. She has just turned 20, and I am trying to love her through this misery. I will not stop fighting to get my daughter back. We have a good relationship now and she trusts me, but I will be having some difficult talks with her soon to (hopefully) make her question these life-altering decisions. In the end, nothing may change but I will not give up. I love her beyond words, but I can see that this is not the solution for her. You're not alone in this craziness. Keep trying, keep questioning, keep loving, and don't give up on her. Your child and your relationship with them is worth it.
Wow! I feel your heartache. From one mother to another. Your story is almost identical to mine. I so agree with you. 100% The internet stole our girls. It is a sick world out there. All we can do is pray that our girls come back to their roots. The roots we planted in them. A solid foundation. We watered their roots with love and laughter and tears. I will never stop fighting for our children who lost their innocence online. Horrific! So please know you’re not alone in the battle. Keep fighting the good fight!!
Why should your daughter, in order to be a girl, have to present herself in the restrictive, out-dated, stereotyped trappings of a girl? That is part of the problem. We need to let children be who they are, wear the hair styles and clothing they like whether they are boys or girls. A girl who likes short hair, sports, and baggy clothes IS A GIRL who likes short hair, sports and baggy clothes. A girl who is attracted to other girls IS A GIRL who is attracted to girls. The trans-mob is one of the most repressive, hetero-normative, stereotyping, misogynist, anti-feminist, anti-lesbian/gay movements to ever exist and be so far reaching. Yes, fight back for your children but not by being trapped by gender stereotyping.