As a female scientist, I have never been into princesses. So when I had my first baby girl, there was no way she was going to be dressed in pink or brainwashed by commercial movies of pretty big-eyed girls being saved by dashing young princes. Instead, my baby Samantha dressed in a mix of “boys” and “girls” clothes. In terms of toys, she initially had her train phase, followed by her super hero phase, and then her Lego phase.
Just to let you know, I have a piece coming out on my Substack in a few days in which I’ve linked your story. I think this is a great essay and I appreciate you having written it. Frederick.
Thank you for sharing this inspiring story! Your daughter can't possibly imagine the bullet she dodged and how very lucky she is to have you as her mother! Well done!
Good article overall, but am I the only one who has an issue with this? "the world is unfair to girls in many ways"
As a 56 year old woman, I just don't think that's true! If anything, it's the other way around. I grew up in an abusive, alcoholic family. We lived on the wrong side of the tracks, were poor, and things were not pleasant and loving. Yet here I am, happy. I was a tomboy as a child. I say this so that it doesn't look like I'm stating this from a state of 'privilege'.
There was a time when it was unfair for women (my mother's time, perhaps) yet those days are long gone.
I admire your courage! You are a strong and loving Mother and you listened to your instincts. Bravo! Most of the stories I have read break my heart so I am happy your daughter returned to you unharmed. The therapists and doctors push this ideology on parents and the pressure is overwhelming. I am glad you pushed back! Best wishes to you and your family!
Such an important story .. the grain of truth in the refrain "some children know from as young as two years old" actually means "some children know from as young as two years old that they have a masculine or feminine essence (and still, that may change). Some children know from very young that they don't feel like the typical girl or boy." OK, yes, fine.
But the leap from there to hormones and surgeries is an abuse of that basic truth, an abuse of the child, an abuse of humanity itself.
Bless you for learning as much as you could and saving your daughter.
Wow, I almost didn't read this because is was about a young child and my son is an RODG 25 yr old. I'm so glad I did. What an important story to share. I hope it gets more coverage. Maybe Benjamin Boyce would interview you? Thank you. Best to you, your daughter and your family. We all understand your obsessiveness in trying to help your child. We do the same.
Well done, you've saved your daughter from a lifetime of confusion and strain, of having to pretend to be someone she can never be and from a lifetime of medical dependence and horrendous complications. It's so interesting that in yours and similar stories we hear that the child is actually relieved once the parents stop affirming. And in other cases where the young person goes on to transition and regrets it, we hear them saying they wish their parents, therapists and doctors hadn't affirmed them in what they later realised was a delusion.
I just want to add that part of the problem is that things that girls are told and expected to wear, even when the clothes feel exposing and humiliating (including getting sexual harassment from boys as well as adult men) being called "girly" will make girls think they must not be girls if they hate those clothes. And the same with toys. When I was growing up, I hated dolls and all the things I was told I should do and be as a girl. They felt so creepy, but I never thought I was a boy or wanted to be one (and hated being called a "tomboy for that same reason.)
Girls can be very wise and more in tune with why they don't like how they are expected to look. When I was a girl we were forced to wear flimsy dresses without pockets to school, which meant often being cold, being humiliated when knocked down by boys looking at our underwear and jeering, feet always hurting because we weren't given comfortable "unfeminine" shoes, and worst of all was the painful forced hair curling, permanents (and for other girls, toxic straighteners). We were considered ornaments really. Of course many girls would love to have another option if one is presented, and sadly the trans cult is promoting what must seem like a special private club for girls (while lying about the horrors, female-hatred, etc.) We must make it so that no girl ever feels unacceptable or "male" for wanting all the things, including status, safety, fun, etc. that boys automatically get.
I'm glad you found your way back before medicalizing. I wish the essay spent more time delving into the two steps of getting off of the pronoun train. Why was your daughter, who had been expressing this dysphoria from a very young age, suddenly OK and relieved by not having to be a "fake boy" anymore? It sounds like a fairly easy path back, but I cannot imagine that it was. I'd think that a child with severe dysphoria would have been much more resistant to the new protocols you were putting in place - but maybe she was still malleable enough due to her young age as opposed to an angsty teenager? I'm curious. But again, very glad for a happy ending!!!
So glad to hear that there's a happy story out there, and I thank you for sharing it. Hope you can continue to share it with the larger community and many others who are wondering about their own child.
This is an eye-opener but what I don't get (as a non-parent) is the whole girls/boys clothes thing. If Sam is uncomfortable in dresses why not just let her wear jeans and hoodies/T-shirts. Pre-puberty it doesn't make much difference in the cut. If girls were just allowed to wear comfy, practical clothes, study shoes for kicking a ball or climbing trees etc they might feel the dysphoria a lot less. Puberty will be a crunch point but most girls come out the other side eventually, many of my friends would have been diagnosed with dysphoria by today's standards and many are now happy mothers in long term relationships straight as well as lesbian. These are the women that are fighting this cult so hard because they realise how their lives could have been so different if they'd been put on blockers, T, given mastectomies and/or phalloplasties. It's obscene and insane what we are doing to children.
What a fascinating and eye opening story, told in such a healthy way. Though I am not personally dealing with a child who has GD, I feel certain that others who do, will ache with relief when they read your journey. Thank you for writing this down and sharing it - this is critical in the fight against this insidious cult, this well meaning ignorance. I'm smiling for you, your daughter and your entire family.
I understand that you cannot name the doctors and counselors here for privacy issues but I hope you can at least warn other parents you know in your community to avoid these quacks.
Just to let you know, I have a piece coming out on my Substack in a few days in which I’ve linked your story. I think this is a great essay and I appreciate you having written it. Frederick.
Thank you for sharing this inspiring story! Your daughter can't possibly imagine the bullet she dodged and how very lucky she is to have you as her mother! Well done!
Good article overall, but am I the only one who has an issue with this? "the world is unfair to girls in many ways"
As a 56 year old woman, I just don't think that's true! If anything, it's the other way around. I grew up in an abusive, alcoholic family. We lived on the wrong side of the tracks, were poor, and things were not pleasant and loving. Yet here I am, happy. I was a tomboy as a child. I say this so that it doesn't look like I'm stating this from a state of 'privilege'.
There was a time when it was unfair for women (my mother's time, perhaps) yet those days are long gone.
I admire your courage! You are a strong and loving Mother and you listened to your instincts. Bravo! Most of the stories I have read break my heart so I am happy your daughter returned to you unharmed. The therapists and doctors push this ideology on parents and the pressure is overwhelming. I am glad you pushed back! Best wishes to you and your family!
Such an important story .. the grain of truth in the refrain "some children know from as young as two years old" actually means "some children know from as young as two years old that they have a masculine or feminine essence (and still, that may change). Some children know from very young that they don't feel like the typical girl or boy." OK, yes, fine.
But the leap from there to hormones and surgeries is an abuse of that basic truth, an abuse of the child, an abuse of humanity itself.
Bless you for learning as much as you could and saving your daughter.
You gave your daughter life...twice. This is what good parenting looks like. Bravo!
Wow, I almost didn't read this because is was about a young child and my son is an RODG 25 yr old. I'm so glad I did. What an important story to share. I hope it gets more coverage. Maybe Benjamin Boyce would interview you? Thank you. Best to you, your daughter and your family. We all understand your obsessiveness in trying to help your child. We do the same.
Well done, you've saved your daughter from a lifetime of confusion and strain, of having to pretend to be someone she can never be and from a lifetime of medical dependence and horrendous complications. It's so interesting that in yours and similar stories we hear that the child is actually relieved once the parents stop affirming. And in other cases where the young person goes on to transition and regrets it, we hear them saying they wish their parents, therapists and doctors hadn't affirmed them in what they later realised was a delusion.
I just want to add that part of the problem is that things that girls are told and expected to wear, even when the clothes feel exposing and humiliating (including getting sexual harassment from boys as well as adult men) being called "girly" will make girls think they must not be girls if they hate those clothes. And the same with toys. When I was growing up, I hated dolls and all the things I was told I should do and be as a girl. They felt so creepy, but I never thought I was a boy or wanted to be one (and hated being called a "tomboy for that same reason.)
Girls can be very wise and more in tune with why they don't like how they are expected to look. When I was a girl we were forced to wear flimsy dresses without pockets to school, which meant often being cold, being humiliated when knocked down by boys looking at our underwear and jeering, feet always hurting because we weren't given comfortable "unfeminine" shoes, and worst of all was the painful forced hair curling, permanents (and for other girls, toxic straighteners). We were considered ornaments really. Of course many girls would love to have another option if one is presented, and sadly the trans cult is promoting what must seem like a special private club for girls (while lying about the horrors, female-hatred, etc.) We must make it so that no girl ever feels unacceptable or "male" for wanting all the things, including status, safety, fun, etc. that boys automatically get.
I'm glad you found your way back before medicalizing. I wish the essay spent more time delving into the two steps of getting off of the pronoun train. Why was your daughter, who had been expressing this dysphoria from a very young age, suddenly OK and relieved by not having to be a "fake boy" anymore? It sounds like a fairly easy path back, but I cannot imagine that it was. I'd think that a child with severe dysphoria would have been much more resistant to the new protocols you were putting in place - but maybe she was still malleable enough due to her young age as opposed to an angsty teenager? I'm curious. But again, very glad for a happy ending!!!
So glad to hear that there's a happy story out there, and I thank you for sharing it. Hope you can continue to share it with the larger community and many others who are wondering about their own child.
It’s nice to read something heartening.
This is an eye-opener but what I don't get (as a non-parent) is the whole girls/boys clothes thing. If Sam is uncomfortable in dresses why not just let her wear jeans and hoodies/T-shirts. Pre-puberty it doesn't make much difference in the cut. If girls were just allowed to wear comfy, practical clothes, study shoes for kicking a ball or climbing trees etc they might feel the dysphoria a lot less. Puberty will be a crunch point but most girls come out the other side eventually, many of my friends would have been diagnosed with dysphoria by today's standards and many are now happy mothers in long term relationships straight as well as lesbian. These are the women that are fighting this cult so hard because they realise how their lives could have been so different if they'd been put on blockers, T, given mastectomies and/or phalloplasties. It's obscene and insane what we are doing to children.
Thanks for sharing your story. You all must be relieved that you found a way out of this disastrous maze. Your perseverance is an inspiration.
What a fascinating and eye opening story, told in such a healthy way. Though I am not personally dealing with a child who has GD, I feel certain that others who do, will ache with relief when they read your journey. Thank you for writing this down and sharing it - this is critical in the fight against this insidious cult, this well meaning ignorance. I'm smiling for you, your daughter and your entire family.
I understand that you cannot name the doctors and counselors here for privacy issues but I hope you can at least warn other parents you know in your community to avoid these quacks.