I suffer from parental dysphoria. Parental Dysphoria is a new condition, that is growing in frequency as the transgender trend picks up steam, infecting all of our children. Specifically, it’s the discomfort with your sense of self and view of reality that results from your child’s sudden announcement that he or she is transgender. Parental Dysphoria commonly results from the immense societal pressure to unquestioningly support your child’s “gender journey”, up to and including social transition to the opposite gender (or, non-binary), wrong-sex hormones, and surgeries.
"It’s feeling that the liberal, progressive values you instilled in your children are being used against you in a way you could never have seen coming. It’s disheartening, destabilizing and destructive." Indeed. Once the trans cult took hold of my firstborn, not only did I regret attending a gay marriage rally with him, but his sisters and I all took a hard right. The left has become wicked. Where did all the anti war, bleeding hearts of the 90's go? Now they tell me that if I don't accept the lie that seeks to destroy my child's body, mind, and spirit, If I try to protect him, I am a hateful, bigoted, horrible mother. #walkaway
Thank you for sharing this. I am not a parent. I am an educator. I have little understanding of trans ideology. I am attempting to just listen to people's experiences. I am questioning how "progressive" the progressive movement is when it silences voices like this. I am sorry for you and your child's pain. I wish you freedom from suffering.
Thank you for sharing your story. You may already be too late to correct any damage done to your child. Remember, YOU are the parent and you—not the schools, the culture, or the child's peers—are responsible for raising your child. You show great wisdom in what has happened. Keep sharing that with other parents. And FORGIVE yourself for not keeping a closer tab on your child. It's hard, really hard these days. But Parents must do it to save our generation of children.
My son has only suggested that he "may" be trans but is bisexual. I have questions about my daughter as well who declared she was gay in middle school but has since claimed she is not. She is 19 now but goes by a "nickname" at college. I have never felt such a loss of control and deep sadness as I have felt with these situations. I definitely blame the internet and anime. I blame myself for being naive. All I can do is pray and try to stay close to my kids as this hopefully passes. Parental Dysphoria is exhausting.
When my oldest transitioned, they *literally* chose new legal name from the Marvel Universe. They were not permitted the surname by the court because it was trademarked. This is not an exaggeration. It is *literally* reality.
At the same time, I feel the writer's grief. Their anger. Their agony. Their struggle. That's real too.
Parental dysphoria is so mentally heart breaking! I nearly lost my 9 yr old daughter, I put up the biggest fight and never gave up, it wasn’t easy, but I now have her back under my wing…
Reading this like I could've wrote this myself… yet I couldn’t have wrote it as perfectly put as this. “Changing their name that likely gets its origin from Pokémon instead of the family heritage” was spot on, as it’s exactly what our children are doing with online indoctrination stuff they watch!! 😣
I could have written so much of this myself, but I have to say, I reject the notion that I have "Parental Dysphoria." My kiddo and I are having parallel experiences, so I will choose to trust myself as a parent and model using difficult things to help me grow, grace in suffering, radical self-love and acceptance, continuous awe and wonder in this rich life we all get to experience, and I will also trust that my kid will one day embrace the awe-inspiring state that is womanhood on a planet that is filled with LIFE that only females can birth into it.
With that said, it took awhile to recover from the initial fear of our situation, the good fortune of working with a really good therapist, and it continues to take conscious effort to not let fear overtake my resolve. Let's use this community as a way to bolster ourselves as we model what womanhood really is for both our girls and our boys. Let's remind through our example, that our girls want it for themselves, and our boys want to protect the integrity of it--because it is sacred! We are powerful and they don't get to take this from us--this IS in our control.
My view is that "leaning into the lie" as a parent is the worst thing we could do. We may have to be a little quiet and we do need to be calm but we parents might be the only ones in our child's lives not to gas light them. (It does take a little while to regain calm once run over by this.)
It's a curious feature of the cult that at all costs EVERYONE without exception (even scientific/medical professionals who one might have been counted on to be curious) MUST instantly affirm to a) be loving and supportive rather than evil b) not become estranged from the child forever. Even pediatricians are told they must instantly affirm or you lose the kid. I think that if the parent is calm and does not affirm the child must understand in their bones somewhere that this is nonsense.
Does anyone else notice the intensity of the cult insistence that Affirmation must be instant and complete or else your child will be estranged/commit suicide. Doesn't it lead to estrangement and sometimes suicide to plant that as part of the belief system in these overly impressionable (by nature of being young) minds? "You must run away from loved ones who do not follow our cult!" How can anyone not see this as an unhealthy religious belief system that has gripped our society? Oh, people are cowed. Or, they don't care. Or, they think it will never affect them. Or, they hear a very one sided narrative.
The kids do act like they are out of "Invasion of the Body Snatches".
And, it's as though our entire society has been taken over by Heaven's Gate.
Sorry, Liz, I know nothing about "platforms" not being a real computer user; however, if you google ROGD USA, will get a form to fill in, and they will connect you to the administrator of the ROGD Canada group. Hope that helps.
The nuclear option was really for my sake. It helped me sustain my internal “over my dead body” stance during escalations of trans ideation or demands for my compliance.
Everything about this is so true. I feel like my beautiful, sweet, artistic and autistic loving Daughter has been brain washed by an ideology that has just increased her mental distress. We are taking her out of school. My daughter's schools have lied to me. Kept things from us as parents. We are NOT conservative in the slightest but have been turned into the villains for not feeling as though our autistic daughter should be able to just self diagnose. I feel like she is in a cult.
Thank you so much for posting this. I have an Autistic daughter who has been captured by this ideology. Its been a very hard couple of years. Like you say, everyone is captured and it makes you feel like there is no support anywhere for us as a family. I didnt realise until recently that her school was pushing the ideology onto students. It makes you feel helpless as a parent, if I had known I would have taken her out of the school.
"It’s feeling that the liberal, progressive values you instilled in your children are being used against you in a way you could never have seen coming. It’s disheartening, destabilizing and destructive." Indeed. Once the trans cult took hold of my firstborn, not only did I regret attending a gay marriage rally with him, but his sisters and I all took a hard right. The left has become wicked. Where did all the anti war, bleeding hearts of the 90's go? Now they tell me that if I don't accept the lie that seeks to destroy my child's body, mind, and spirit, If I try to protect him, I am a hateful, bigoted, horrible mother. #walkaway
Thank you for sharing this. I am not a parent. I am an educator. I have little understanding of trans ideology. I am attempting to just listen to people's experiences. I am questioning how "progressive" the progressive movement is when it silences voices like this. I am sorry for you and your child's pain. I wish you freedom from suffering.
Thank you for sharing your story. You may already be too late to correct any damage done to your child. Remember, YOU are the parent and you—not the schools, the culture, or the child's peers—are responsible for raising your child. You show great wisdom in what has happened. Keep sharing that with other parents. And FORGIVE yourself for not keeping a closer tab on your child. It's hard, really hard these days. But Parents must do it to save our generation of children.
All the best to you. Peace.
My son has only suggested that he "may" be trans but is bisexual. I have questions about my daughter as well who declared she was gay in middle school but has since claimed she is not. She is 19 now but goes by a "nickname" at college. I have never felt such a loss of control and deep sadness as I have felt with these situations. I definitely blame the internet and anime. I blame myself for being naive. All I can do is pray and try to stay close to my kids as this hopefully passes. Parental Dysphoria is exhausting.
This nearly brought me to tears.
When my oldest transitioned, they *literally* chose new legal name from the Marvel Universe. They were not permitted the surname by the court because it was trademarked. This is not an exaggeration. It is *literally* reality.
At the same time, I feel the writer's grief. Their anger. Their agony. Their struggle. That's real too.
💔
Parental dysphoria is so mentally heart breaking! I nearly lost my 9 yr old daughter, I put up the biggest fight and never gave up, it wasn’t easy, but I now have her back under my wing…
Reading this like I could've wrote this myself… yet I couldn’t have wrote it as perfectly put as this. “Changing their name that likely gets its origin from Pokémon instead of the family heritage” was spot on, as it’s exactly what our children are doing with online indoctrination stuff they watch!! 😣
Exactly
That is spot on.
I could have written so much of this myself, but I have to say, I reject the notion that I have "Parental Dysphoria." My kiddo and I are having parallel experiences, so I will choose to trust myself as a parent and model using difficult things to help me grow, grace in suffering, radical self-love and acceptance, continuous awe and wonder in this rich life we all get to experience, and I will also trust that my kid will one day embrace the awe-inspiring state that is womanhood on a planet that is filled with LIFE that only females can birth into it.
With that said, it took awhile to recover from the initial fear of our situation, the good fortune of working with a really good therapist, and it continues to take conscious effort to not let fear overtake my resolve. Let's use this community as a way to bolster ourselves as we model what womanhood really is for both our girls and our boys. Let's remind through our example, that our girls want it for themselves, and our boys want to protect the integrity of it--because it is sacred! We are powerful and they don't get to take this from us--this IS in our control.
My view is that "leaning into the lie" as a parent is the worst thing we could do. We may have to be a little quiet and we do need to be calm but we parents might be the only ones in our child's lives not to gas light them. (It does take a little while to regain calm once run over by this.)
It's a curious feature of the cult that at all costs EVERYONE without exception (even scientific/medical professionals who one might have been counted on to be curious) MUST instantly affirm to a) be loving and supportive rather than evil b) not become estranged from the child forever. Even pediatricians are told they must instantly affirm or you lose the kid. I think that if the parent is calm and does not affirm the child must understand in their bones somewhere that this is nonsense.
Does anyone else notice the intensity of the cult insistence that Affirmation must be instant and complete or else your child will be estranged/commit suicide. Doesn't it lead to estrangement and sometimes suicide to plant that as part of the belief system in these overly impressionable (by nature of being young) minds? "You must run away from loved ones who do not follow our cult!" How can anyone not see this as an unhealthy religious belief system that has gripped our society? Oh, people are cowed. Or, they don't care. Or, they think it will never affect them. Or, they hear a very one sided narrative.
The kids do act like they are out of "Invasion of the Body Snatches".
And, it's as though our entire society has been taken over by Heaven's Gate.
Sorry, Liz, I know nothing about "platforms" not being a real computer user; however, if you google ROGD USA, will get a form to fill in, and they will connect you to the administrator of the ROGD Canada group. Hope that helps.
The nuclear option was really for my sake. It helped me sustain my internal “over my dead body” stance during escalations of trans ideation or demands for my compliance.
Thank you
Everything about this is so true. I feel like my beautiful, sweet, artistic and autistic loving Daughter has been brain washed by an ideology that has just increased her mental distress. We are taking her out of school. My daughter's schools have lied to me. Kept things from us as parents. We are NOT conservative in the slightest but have been turned into the villains for not feeling as though our autistic daughter should be able to just self diagnose. I feel like she is in a cult.
Thank you so much for posting this. I have an Autistic daughter who has been captured by this ideology. Its been a very hard couple of years. Like you say, everyone is captured and it makes you feel like there is no support anywhere for us as a family. I didnt realise until recently that her school was pushing the ideology onto students. It makes you feel helpless as a parent, if I had known I would have taken her out of the school.