My husband won't accept my sons new "feminine "name, so my son won't talk with him. Husband says to me, when I do actually call son new name, that I am supporting his confusion.
I have told my dear son although I will call him a new name only when unavoidable, I am not saying he could be or ever will be, or needs to be anything other than who he is, that his healthy biology should not be changed.
That whatever untypical and unusual ways he wants to change his exterior, are just that; unusual but not unnatural.
This is exactly what happened to my dear sister - one day, her call to her 18 year-old son goes to voicemail. Then next her texts are blocked. Then all communication, all contact is cut. Her child is gone.
I have kept in contact with my nephew on a very simple texting platform. Not often, not a lot, and I an only giving information about our family as needed. I ask nothing about pronouns, his new name, where he is living. I sent money for Christmas and he responded in kind. His birthday is coming up and I will send a money gift and hope to hear from him. It gives my sister hope that there is a thread of her son still connected thru me. I pray every day for my nephew and hope that the broken relationship between he and my sister will be mended. He was groomed by a teacher and he believes all the lies.
The more the truth is revealed, the more media coverage from whistleblowers, the more reports and books that are written against this trans cult, holding the groomers and teachers and doctors accountable, exposing the damage that has been done - then the greater the chance that our children will find the truth and be spared and return to their families. Keep fighting this fight - we will win this war against this cult! Good vs Evil and the tide is changing!
I have an 8x10 production photo of the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956) autographed by Kevin McCarthy and Dana Wynter. A couple of years ago when I got into this fight, I put that on my wall next to the place where I tweet and doomscroll the gender gibberish every day. I must glance at it 200 times a day.
This surprised me: "Based on the 149 responses to this survey and the over 1,000 responses and counting to our ongoing second survey, our estimate is that about 10% of sex-realist family members may end up estranged from a trans-identified adult child to some degree." I would have thought it would be most families. Our son stopped talking to us during high school, only speaking to us to say he hated us and couldn't wait for us to die. There was no reason. We weren't perfect parents, but we loved him and, if anything, spoiled him and were too accommodating. We got him expensive therapists. We tried to get him to do family counseling, but he had no interest. He moved out shortly after graduating and started transitioning quickly afterwards. He had already been on hormones for several months when he told us. Now and then we send him an email to say we're thinking of him, but there is never any response. He threatened to kill us if we ever call him.
I'm old, but I remember that when I was a teenager there were other teenagers who were heterosexual, mentally well-adjusted, and got along with their parents. Lots of them. Do such young people still exist?
Thank you. As the grandmother of 3 adult wounded people taking this route out of reality, I thank you. The resources and the helps you have listed are amazing. "How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news..." (Isaiah 52:7) Everyone, please, please, keep up the good work. We, who live every day with estrangement and pain, as parents, as grandparents and family members have to know now, that the tide is turning. Praise God, there is hope. Never, ever give up. Love, Indio
Did you mention that often the kids or adults are just LGB and if we work on ridding our society of homophobia and misogyny (two sides of the same coin) that would foster self-acceptance and perhaps decrease the likelihood they will 'transition.' And in those situations where there are homophobic parents who would rather hormonally and surgically mutilate their child making them a medical patient for their shortened life rather than have a whole and healthy homosexual son or daughter it is the parents who need help.
Some in the Western world are estranged from reality itself and from any ethical grounding whatsoever--esp. in the 'helping'/medical professions. We (the U.S.) exported the dangerous fiction of 'trans' 'gender identity' and its movement across the Western world. This powerful video just dropped, I urge you to watch it b/c this has been happening in the U.S. as well.
Our daugter cut the connection with 16, not being able to accept that we had given birth to two boys and made SHE a girl. Some things are just as they are, and it is sad, that noone has courage to tell her, that she is not a better human, not a progressive human, but a greedy and extremly jelauous person who thinks all in life is granted for free. I don´t know, why, at which point and how it happed, but we raised a child with extremly lack of values. This child was evaluated as extraordinary gifted. But it seems to be not enough, to learn why do other people cry. We have offered everything. Even gender non affirming therapie, but there is no way to help someone, who doenst accept any help. There is no way to help someone who thinks, to be better than you. There is no way to help someone who cannot listen.
We do have a child with a significant disability, who has a huge disadvantage, but it isn't her. We do have another child, who couldn't choose the perfect job for him, because of one very tiny diability, but it isn't her. She was perfect, she could have choosen so many things. But she always wanted to be in the midddle of the mainstream, and that is definitly not in.
Thank you and yes I agree with this , "“the path out of hell is through misery,” meaning that if parents can radically accept where they are right now, can radically accept their pain, they may paradoxically eventually be able to move past their suffering. Take care of yourself. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself time." There is no other option on that road.
I am glad I read this. I thought I was alone and possibly too cold hearted in my thinking that, she's gone, she did it. It's not my fault. If she wants to come back ,fine. I'd be glad. If she doesn't no problem.
I'm angry and won't chase after her. Good luck to her but I'm not all that eager to have her back with the nasty things she said on her way out. If she does come back she better be ready to apologize for the hurtful and untruthful things she said on the way out.
If she makes it on her own, good. I will claim some credit for that. I always tried to prepare her for life on her own. I never thought it would be with out me as a supporting resource but I wanted her to have the skills to be independent. I taught her how too cook, how to sew, how to shoot a rifle, what jobs might be better for her than others and why, how to drive, how to manage finances, the list goes on. If she does survive it will be at least in part because of my parenting.
Good luck and don't let the door hit you on your bottom on the way out! I've got better things to do than chase after an ungrateful brat.
PITT's team is doing God's work with surveys and pieces like these. There is a lot of hope in these takeaways - cold comfort for those parents and families that have already suffered terribly from trans estrangement to be sure, but we'll take any glimmer these days.
I would add The Stepford Wives, in addition to Invasion of the Body Snatchers. I personally have suffered the shock of another mom who became engulfed in the trance of gender ideology, and saw the internal strife as she smiled a tortured smile (like the fake smile of a Stepford wife), explaining the situation with her son, who came out once he went off to college and started hormones a few months later. She spoke of the other wonderful mothers she had met, how they all congratulated her when she explained that her son had newly "come out as trans." She confessed, with much guilt, that she didn't always feel like it deserved congratulations, but then she quickly followed this with "but I'm trying to be really happy about this!" and went on to say she was extremely thankful she didn't live in Texas, and her kid was free to receive "gender-affirming care." (While I think Texas' law criminalizing affirming parents was a step too far, I am not "thankful" that kids in other states are "free" to mutilate themselves.) Anyway, thanks so much for putting together this survey and the results! I can only hope its results soon become obsolete - but, even if things change quickly, we will need to document the harms done and the patterns formed, lest this phenomenon be repeated in some other, as of yet unimaginable, form.
Finally, someone else is relating the movie “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” to the gender ideology movement - I have been saying this for years! And I’ve lost my adult child to this, and am up against a steel gauntlet because of who she lives with. The gauntlet being made up of people who further alienate me from my already estranged daughter. Including her father.
I am glad this survey was done, and hopefully it will be enlightening to others who need to realize the ramifications of alienation from a loved one who is enveloped in gender identity affirming ideology.
Accept vs. Agree
My husband won't accept my sons new "feminine "name, so my son won't talk with him. Husband says to me, when I do actually call son new name, that I am supporting his confusion.
I have told my dear son although I will call him a new name only when unavoidable, I am not saying he could be or ever will be, or needs to be anything other than who he is, that his healthy biology should not be changed.
That whatever untypical and unusual ways he wants to change his exterior, are just that; unusual but not unnatural.
....advice?
This is exactly what happened to my dear sister - one day, her call to her 18 year-old son goes to voicemail. Then next her texts are blocked. Then all communication, all contact is cut. Her child is gone.
I have kept in contact with my nephew on a very simple texting platform. Not often, not a lot, and I an only giving information about our family as needed. I ask nothing about pronouns, his new name, where he is living. I sent money for Christmas and he responded in kind. His birthday is coming up and I will send a money gift and hope to hear from him. It gives my sister hope that there is a thread of her son still connected thru me. I pray every day for my nephew and hope that the broken relationship between he and my sister will be mended. He was groomed by a teacher and he believes all the lies.
The more the truth is revealed, the more media coverage from whistleblowers, the more reports and books that are written against this trans cult, holding the groomers and teachers and doctors accountable, exposing the damage that has been done - then the greater the chance that our children will find the truth and be spared and return to their families. Keep fighting this fight - we will win this war against this cult! Good vs Evil and the tide is changing!
I have an 8x10 production photo of the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956) autographed by Kevin McCarthy and Dana Wynter. A couple of years ago when I got into this fight, I put that on my wall next to the place where I tweet and doomscroll the gender gibberish every day. I must glance at it 200 times a day.
This surprised me: "Based on the 149 responses to this survey and the over 1,000 responses and counting to our ongoing second survey, our estimate is that about 10% of sex-realist family members may end up estranged from a trans-identified adult child to some degree." I would have thought it would be most families. Our son stopped talking to us during high school, only speaking to us to say he hated us and couldn't wait for us to die. There was no reason. We weren't perfect parents, but we loved him and, if anything, spoiled him and were too accommodating. We got him expensive therapists. We tried to get him to do family counseling, but he had no interest. He moved out shortly after graduating and started transitioning quickly afterwards. He had already been on hormones for several months when he told us. Now and then we send him an email to say we're thinking of him, but there is never any response. He threatened to kill us if we ever call him.
I'm old, but I remember that when I was a teenager there were other teenagers who were heterosexual, mentally well-adjusted, and got along with their parents. Lots of them. Do such young people still exist?
Thank you. As the grandmother of 3 adult wounded people taking this route out of reality, I thank you. The resources and the helps you have listed are amazing. "How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news..." (Isaiah 52:7) Everyone, please, please, keep up the good work. We, who live every day with estrangement and pain, as parents, as grandparents and family members have to know now, that the tide is turning. Praise God, there is hope. Never, ever give up. Love, Indio
Did you mention that often the kids or adults are just LGB and if we work on ridding our society of homophobia and misogyny (two sides of the same coin) that would foster self-acceptance and perhaps decrease the likelihood they will 'transition.' And in those situations where there are homophobic parents who would rather hormonally and surgically mutilate their child making them a medical patient for their shortened life rather than have a whole and healthy homosexual son or daughter it is the parents who need help.
"What do you mean do I want a live daughter or a dead son"
I've been thinking about this for a while now and have decided it is the best marketing campaign ever.
Brought to you by big pharma, the American Psychological Association and The American College of Surgeons.
Buy our products and services or you will die!
It really is evil genius.
Some in the Western world are estranged from reality itself and from any ethical grounding whatsoever--esp. in the 'helping'/medical professions. We (the U.S.) exported the dangerous fiction of 'trans' 'gender identity' and its movement across the Western world. This powerful video just dropped, I urge you to watch it b/c this has been happening in the U.S. as well.
https://dennisnoelkavanagh.substack.com/p/barrys-powerful-video-on-the-tav
Our daugter cut the connection with 16, not being able to accept that we had given birth to two boys and made SHE a girl. Some things are just as they are, and it is sad, that noone has courage to tell her, that she is not a better human, not a progressive human, but a greedy and extremly jelauous person who thinks all in life is granted for free. I don´t know, why, at which point and how it happed, but we raised a child with extremly lack of values. This child was evaluated as extraordinary gifted. But it seems to be not enough, to learn why do other people cry. We have offered everything. Even gender non affirming therapie, but there is no way to help someone, who doenst accept any help. There is no way to help someone who thinks, to be better than you. There is no way to help someone who cannot listen.
We do have a child with a significant disability, who has a huge disadvantage, but it isn't her. We do have another child, who couldn't choose the perfect job for him, because of one very tiny diability, but it isn't her. She was perfect, she could have choosen so many things. But she always wanted to be in the midddle of the mainstream, and that is definitly not in.
Thank you and yes I agree with this , "“the path out of hell is through misery,” meaning that if parents can radically accept where they are right now, can radically accept their pain, they may paradoxically eventually be able to move past their suffering. Take care of yourself. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself time." There is no other option on that road.
I am glad I read this. I thought I was alone and possibly too cold hearted in my thinking that, she's gone, she did it. It's not my fault. If she wants to come back ,fine. I'd be glad. If she doesn't no problem.
I'm angry and won't chase after her. Good luck to her but I'm not all that eager to have her back with the nasty things she said on her way out. If she does come back she better be ready to apologize for the hurtful and untruthful things she said on the way out.
If she makes it on her own, good. I will claim some credit for that. I always tried to prepare her for life on her own. I never thought it would be with out me as a supporting resource but I wanted her to have the skills to be independent. I taught her how too cook, how to sew, how to shoot a rifle, what jobs might be better for her than others and why, how to drive, how to manage finances, the list goes on. If she does survive it will be at least in part because of my parenting.
Good luck and don't let the door hit you on your bottom on the way out! I've got better things to do than chase after an ungrateful brat.
PITT's team is doing God's work with surveys and pieces like these. There is a lot of hope in these takeaways - cold comfort for those parents and families that have already suffered terribly from trans estrangement to be sure, but we'll take any glimmer these days.
I would add The Stepford Wives, in addition to Invasion of the Body Snatchers. I personally have suffered the shock of another mom who became engulfed in the trance of gender ideology, and saw the internal strife as she smiled a tortured smile (like the fake smile of a Stepford wife), explaining the situation with her son, who came out once he went off to college and started hormones a few months later. She spoke of the other wonderful mothers she had met, how they all congratulated her when she explained that her son had newly "come out as trans." She confessed, with much guilt, that she didn't always feel like it deserved congratulations, but then she quickly followed this with "but I'm trying to be really happy about this!" and went on to say she was extremely thankful she didn't live in Texas, and her kid was free to receive "gender-affirming care." (While I think Texas' law criminalizing affirming parents was a step too far, I am not "thankful" that kids in other states are "free" to mutilate themselves.) Anyway, thanks so much for putting together this survey and the results! I can only hope its results soon become obsolete - but, even if things change quickly, we will need to document the harms done and the patterns formed, lest this phenomenon be repeated in some other, as of yet unimaginable, form.
Finally, someone else is relating the movie “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” to the gender ideology movement - I have been saying this for years! And I’ve lost my adult child to this, and am up against a steel gauntlet because of who she lives with. The gauntlet being made up of people who further alienate me from my already estranged daughter. Including her father.
I am glad this survey was done, and hopefully it will be enlightening to others who need to realize the ramifications of alienation from a loved one who is enveloped in gender identity affirming ideology.
Good post thanks. Just added it to my comments section of this post:
https://open.substack.com/pub/kwnorton/p/they-come-for-our-kids?r=boqs0&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web